


To Kindle the Phoenix's Flame

by wabakebab



Category: One Piece
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Immortality, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Time Loop, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:07:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26049277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wabakebab/pseuds/wabakebab
Summary: "I don't wanna live a thousand years. If I just live through today, that'll be enough."Everything always goes wrong. Ace is literally immortal, so why can't he stop everyone from falling? He has lived hundreds of years, so why can't he stop everyone from throwing their lives away for one that can't end? But this time will be different. This time, he will find freedom.
Comments: 15
Kudos: 75
Collections: Time Travel and World Travel





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Trapped in Eternity](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18086777) by [Skyleaf19](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyleaf19/pseuds/Skyleaf19). 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No pairings. This is my first story, so I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece. (Buggy D. Clown is One Piece) (that's a joke pls don't hate me)

_"Was I a good father?"_

Then, everything went dark.

* * *

Ace opened his eyes, blinking under the light of the blue sky over the sea. He lay in a small yet familiar fishing boat, rocking at the mercy of the waves. _Shit._

**. . . no regrets . . .**

**. . . entire world . . . is my enemy . . .**

**. . . defeat them all . . .**

**. . . surpass them all . . .**

**. . . proof I lived . . .**

The strange voices were the only thing breaking the eerie silence. Ever since Ace had first died at Marineford, they kept coming back, as if haunting him. They followed him everywhere.

These words belonged to himself. Spoken to Sabo and Luffy, and to Red-Haired Shanks who had once saved Luffy's life. Yet he had broken them.

First things first. Ace jumped into the cold water, keeping a hand on his boat to stay near the surface. He drowned. Then came back. Then drowned. Then came back. It wasn't a very pleasant experience, but necessary.

The now 17-year-old climbed back onto the boat, teeth chattering and shivering. There weren't many instances where he was cold.

He blankly staring off into the distance as the events of _this time_ came crashing down on him.

Oyaji had died. Again. Trying to protect his son, without even knowing that Ace _didn't need protecting._

The damn marines couldn't kill him no matter how many they sent, because Ace couldn't die. Even if he was riddled with Haki-infused bullets from all directions, or slit in the throat, or fisted by a certain magma freak again. _He was immortal._

No matter what they did to him, he would just heal. And it was a very disturbing thing to watch.

Ace swallowed and closed his eyes, trying to turn away from the thought that the Whitebeards had once again fallen because of him.

The first time, he thought he had been given another chance at life. Well, you can't exactly call it life if you **can't even fucking die.**

The 10th time, he decided to just stay away from the Whitebeards.

He had tried to tell them that he literally couldn't die, but there was always something stopping him.

If he tried to tell them straight out, his voice got stuck. If he tried to write a message, his hand refused to move. If he even tried to use sign language, his hands again refused to move. Even if he tried hurting himself in front of the others to prove he could heal, his body would decide in that moment to not heal. And if anyone had somehow managed to figure it out, Kami would just laugh at them and they would forget about it the next day.

I _f getting close to them just got them hurt, then just stay away, right?_ Wrong. Oh how very _wrong._

Every time, he would meet someone who was willing to throw their life away to save his.

Whether it was the Whitebeards who just happened to be on the same island and just had to get involved in his business, or one of the members of the Spade Pirates from the original timeline (who didn't even know him yet).

This time was, what, somewhere in the 400s? 500s?

Yet even after all these loops, the ex-Commander still didn't understand the circumstances behind his resets.

Sometimes, it was after dozens under his division froze to death because he hadn't been strong enough to protect them.

Sometimes, it was when another of his brothers fell.

Or other times it was while he silently screamed during the night.

* * *

Although Ace knew the way to Sixis – after all, he had done this hundreds of times – he wouldn't be heading there.

This time, he was going to die. Or at least figure out how to die.

He had tried doing this once, and spent a good 3 years experimenting with dumb ways to die.

**A/N: Dumb Ways to Die hahaha. I know. I'm hilarious.**

It all fell apart when he accidentally ended up causing a mess on an island which just had to be under Whitebeard's protection in the Grand Line.

Then he just had to be invited to the Whitebeards again.

But the universe hated the fire user, so he just had to fall asleep right there, and awoke on the Moby Dick.

After trying to murder Teach – who was now the 2nd division Commander – and managing to convince everyone that he was very mentally unhinged, Ace was forced to run away.

The actual traitor ended up eating the Yami Yami no mi after simply saying that he wanted it, and decided to chase after the Fire Logia because supposedly "Ace was his responsibility."

Unfortunately for him, the outcome of Teach vs Ace on Banaro Island ended with the ex-Commander beating the shit (and life) out of the 2nd division Commander.

That timeline had then just randomly reset as he was staring up into the sky, thinking about how every single Whitebeard Pirate now probably wanted him dead.

* * *

Ace stood on the gallows, seeing the same views his father had once saw. Standing on the same gallows that his father had once kneeled on.

After heading south-west for a bit, he had stopped at Loguetown, " _the town of the beginning and the end,"_ for supplies.

The place where _he_ was executed, leaving behind a wife and an unborn son.

Gol D. Roger was a demon. Gol D. Ace was a demon.

He had watched his nakama and brothers fall. Over, and over, and over.

And in the end, he was always the only one left standing.

He didn't have the right to say, _"it was good that I was born."_

_**"Hey!"** _

Ace ignored the marine, yet he couldn't help but smile. _Smokey._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone's confused, Ace does not have the Mera Mera no mi. He's going to get it later.
> 
> Yeah I know this is short. Future chapters will be longer.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 is here. I don't have an upload schedule, so don't expect new chapters this often. (Updates are now every Friday)
> 
> Hope you enjoy.
> 
> I don't own One Piece.

Smoker had just been strolling through the bustling streets, towards the town square, when he saw a crowd gathered around the gallows. Pushing through the crowd, he saw the few soldiers stationed around threatening the offender to come down.

He scowled, looking up at the teenager – sixteen, maybe seventeen years old – who kneeled at the exact same spot the Pirate King had been 19 years ago. Dark hair framed his freckled face, and on top sat a bright orange cowboy hat, a happy and sad smiley adorning its band.

_Impertinent brat._

_**"Oi, brat!"** _

Then, he saw the boy's eyes.

An unsettling feeling spread through his mind, but he couldn't quite place a finger on what it was.

What was it in those eyes? Regret? Loneliness? Anger?

Smoker shook his unease away.

_**"Hey!"** _

The brat seemed to ignore him, but Smoker, for a second, could've sworn he saw a smile flicker across the boy's face.

The Marine sighed. He had had enough of this.

Outstretching his hand, he prepared to use his smoke to just get the offender down with force.

He blinked. There wasn't anything to get the offender down from. The execution platform was now in pieces.

* * *

Out of the corner of his eye, Ace could see Smokey's hand outstretched. He's about to use his Devil Fruit. After centuries of this endless loop, Ace's Observation Haki was well-trained to the point where he could see several minutes into the future.

_Well then. Time to finish this up._

Covering his hand with Haki, Ace grinned as he stood up. He punched the execution platform. And it shattered.

The grin left Ace's face as soon as he was off the execution platform.

By the time the dust cleared, he was gone, running off into the streets.

It wasn't as if destroying the gallows was anything new.

Ever since he had first accidentally stumbled into Loguetown somewhere in the 100s and destroyed the platform that Roger was executed on, he began coming here and doing that often.

**(A/N: meaning he was somewhere in the 100s in terms of number of loops)**

A wave of lethargy washed over Ace.

_Shit._

He collapsed face-forward.

* * *

Smoker inwardly groaned as he tried to remember all the events that had led up to a national monument being destroyed.

As he outstretched his hand, he had remembered the kid grinning.

That smile. The same cocky, carefree smile he'd seen on that man's face so many years ago.

But it _wasn't_ the same. There had been something else in there. Tiredness. Pain. Maniacal? Hm. Perhaps this kid was mentally unhinged.

He had then, like the brat he was, proceeded to destroy the execution platform in one punch. By the time the dust had cleared, the offender – most likely a pirate – was gone. And the gallows in pieces.

How did you destroy all that in one punch anyways? When the kid had done it, Smoker could've sworn he saw his fist turn some sort of metal-like black. What was that called? Hoki?

"Mashikaku!"

"Yes, Smoker-san!"

"Tell the higher-ups that the brat can use Hoki."

"I think it's Haka, sir."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Or maybe it's chakra."

"You think that brat's a ninja?"

"Then that's all the more reason to capture him."

"..."

"We need to make him show us **Oiroke no Jutsu**."

"Just you."

_Purupurupuru... purupurupuru..._

Smoker's eyes fell on the small snail he was forced to carry around.

"Hello? Is this Captain Smoker?"

"Speaking," he barked into the Baby Den Den Mushi.

"We've apprehended the perpetrator."

"... what."

"We... uh... found him lying in the streets asleep."

* * *

_Deuce died._

_Skull died._

_Mihar died._

_They all died._

_"Sorry... Captain."_

_Oyaji died._

_Marco died._

_Thatch died._

_They all died._

_"Forgive me... my sons."_

_Luffy died._

_The Straw Hats died._

_They all died._

_"Ace. I'm dead."_

_And Portgas D. Ace was the only one standing._

_He was alone in a field of crimson._

* * *

Ace woke up screaming, gasping for air.

_Oyaji covered in wounds and a scalding hole in his chest, crimson blood dripping from his lips._

_Thatch lying in a pool of blood, haltering breaths escaping his lips, betrayal and fear in his eyes as he realized he would never be able to prank his brothers again._

He pushed the fresh images to the back of his head, and swallowed, breathing in the smell of... sewage and corpses.

_Oh. I'm in a prison. Of a Marine base. Great._

"Yo," Ace casually greeted one of the guards.

He was answered by a menacing glare.

The 17-year-old sighed, leaning his head back against the wall. He wasn't afraid, or nervous, or panicked. This had happened all too many times before.

His hands were chained together with seastone handcuffs. Did they think he had been using a Devil Fruit back when he destroyed the gallows?

_"Ace! I'm here to save you!"_

_"Ace-kun!"_

_"I'll save you even if I die!"_

_"Was I a good father?"_

"Oh shitty shit shit shit fucking shit."

The voice quickly snapped Ace out of it. As he turned to find the source of it, he would've laughed.

But he had forgotten how to laugh long ago.

 _Buggy._ A no-name pirate who had once sailed with Red-Haired Shanks on the Oro Jackson.

Buggy D. Clown turned his head and glared at him. "What you lookin' at, huh?"

Memories of partying with a red-nosed clown on the Big Top flooded back to Ace, and he remembered the polite introduction he had first given.

"Ah. Apologies for disrupting your cursing session. My name is Ace," he said as he bowed his head, "please accept my apology."

"Oh, no need to be so formal. I should be apologizing too," Buggy replied cheerfully, "Wait. I asked _what you were looking at_! I don't care what your name is!"

"I was – "

" _Huuuh?_ My nose? You say I have a big red nose? HUH?!"

"Quiet!" a voice gruffly snapped.

"Hey," Ace smirked, a fake smile plastered on his face, " _Smokey_."

Smoker simply glowered at him, "I'm here to interrogate you, brat,"

"'Course you are."

His interrogator bent down to meet the prisoner at eye level. "Who are you?"

"Gol D. Ace."

Ace didn't give a damn about his parentage anymore. Sure, he hated that bastard of a father, but he just didn't care at this point.

"W-wh-" Buggy sputtered, staring wide-eyed.

The Marine just raised an eyebrow at this, clearly not believing a word, "Is that why you destroyed the execution platform?"

"No. I just did that for fun."

_Why did I destroy it, actually?_

"Are you a pirate?"

"Nope," he replied nonchalantly, popping the p.

Smoker groaned, pressing his hands against his eyes, and simply turned on his heel and left.

"Huh. Ok."

"Y-you-" Ace turned to meet the gaze of a very dumbfounded red-nosed clown, "You're Captain's son?"

"Yeah?"

* * *

Buggy stared dumbfounded at the self-proclaimed "Gol D. Ace."

There was no way. His Captain had a son and didn't bother telling anyone about it?

Then he remembered Baterilla. The Marines had been looking for a child back then. Roger's child.

_But Captain was a monster. Hell, everybody on that ship was a monster..._

"How did you get caught?"

"I fell asleep."

Buggy blinked, "...what?"

"I fell asleep. I do that sometimes."

"...I see."

The guards outside suddenly started chatting.

"Gol D. Ace," one smirked, "You shouldn't have lied about your parentage."

The kid simply raised an eyebrow.

"Your execution is in a week."

Everybody but Buggy and the kid collapsed to the floor, foam collecting at their mouths.

_Conqueror's Haki. Of course he has it._

"So," Ace said airily, "Time to get out of here."

Buggy stared. The kid stood there flexing his wrists, his seastone handcuffs on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oiroke no Jutsu = ...sexy no jutsu.
> 
> If anyone's wondering how Ace got out of his handcuffs, I'm going with "he dislocated his thumb." I'm not even sure if you can do that without fucking up your hand, but let's pretend it's possible.
> 
> Remember that Smoker is 3 years younger than canon, so won't be as experienced.
> 
> Also, if you're curious about what Buggy is doing here: it's because he is the legendary Buggy D. Clown. He was just hiding his strength all along. And yes, I am going to make that actually happen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the support!
> 
> Y'know, I feel like I'm not making Ace psychotic enough.
> 
> I've decided that updates will be every Friday.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

The two prisoners ran through the hallway, stepping over and around the bodies of unconscious guards.

"Hey! You two!"

"Get us out of here!"

Buggy seemed to hesitate as he ran – or flew – past the other prisoners banging on the cell doors.

"Don't," Ace warned.

"Where do you two think you're going?" A voice growled without preamble.

"Out of here," the ex-Logia user snickered, "Duh," quickly settling into a fighting stance as his opponent did the same.

A fist of smoke was fired at his face, but Ace easily dodged it as he darted forward, a Haki-covered fist connecting with Smoker's jaw.

The Marine staggered away, fighting to get his air back. Managing to straighten up, incredulity flickered across his face as he wiped the blood dripping from his mouth.

"You...," he whispered, disappearing in smoke.

Reappearing behind Ace, Smoker launched a barrage of jabs with his jutte.

They were all met with air.

_Too slow._

_A right hook to the head. He thinks I won't expect it._

Taking the opportunity, a fast Haki-covered punch connected with the smoke-user's gut, sending him flying into the wall.

Ace walked away indifferently. Smoker was actually one of the few Marines he was grateful towards, since he had – according to Luffy – helped the Straw Hats out many times.

_Hopefully I didn't break anything._

"I-… y-you-" Buggy stuttered. While the two had been fighting, he had been sneaking away. Now, Buggy looked nervously back on the unconscious Marine Captain, gulping.

"Let's go," Ace muttered.

* * *

"I-… I'm coming with you," Buggy declared, his voice wavering.

The two escapees stood in front of a small boat belonging to who-the-hell-cares-who.

"No," was the answer he was met with.

If this were any other boy, the clown never would've imagined doing this. After all, he was a monster, just like Captain.

_Fucking D's._

Buggy had already watched as Roger, the closest thing he had ever had to a father, was beheaded in front of his eyes.

But he had spent so long hiding in the shadows.

It was time to show the world what Buggy D. Clown could really do.

"Where are you going anyways?"

"Who knows. I'm going to try and figure out how to die in the Grand Line."

"What does that even mean?" the Roger Pirate murmured, "What, are you immortal or something?"

The boy opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, he just shut his mouth again, turning away as he shook his head.

"You can come."

"Wha-"

"But not my problem if you end up dying in a pit with 205 broken bones."

"WHA-" Buggy cleared his throat, "As if the great pirate Buggy D. Clown could ever die!"

"Get in and kindly try not to fall overboard and drown whilst getting eaten by a Sea King."

* * *

Ace closed his eyes as he opened his mouth to take a bite of the fruit he and Buggy had brought along.

Just then, the ex-Logia's Observation Haki caught on to something... strange. _It was as if something had changed._

As his teeth sunk into the fruit, "aALKJLKAFJKhikD-" his eyes snapped open to the horrible taste.

Buggy shot him a confused and alarmed look.

"What the hell is this?" Ace yelled, disgusted, "It tastes like a Devil Fruit!"

_Wait, shit... a Devil Fruit?_

The 17-year-old stared down at the fruit he had just bitten into. _The Mera Mera no mi._

"Woah woah, a Devil Fruit?" Buggy yelped in alarm. "How the hell did it get here? And... the amount of money we could get if we sold it... hehe..."

Suddenly, Ace's eyes grew wide as his Observation Haki sensed something, and he stared aghast out at the endless ocean. _Deuce?_

He turned his head back to meet the clown's confused gaze. "We need to go," he snapped sharply.

The DF-eater jumped over the cabin to land in front of the back railing. He waved his hands across the back of the boat, and a wave of flames immediately appeared to propel the boat forwards.

"HUH?!" The red-nosed man screeched as the small vessel shot forward.

"W-wait, where are we going?! And that was a Logia?!"

"We're going South."

"HUUUUH?! That's heading straight into the Calm Belt!"

"Well, we can't exactly make it up Reverse Mountain in this pathetic boat."

Ace didn't want to see Deuce. His first-mate had sacrificed himself enough for a good-for-nothing captain.

He gritted his teeth. _No way no way no way no way no way **no way in hell he would let-**_

Suddenly, a huge Sea King erupted out of the calm waves. And it wasn't alone.

"Why did I decide to come along?!" Buggy wailed ruefully.

A harsh glare from Ace and a suppressed burst of Conqueror's Haki sent them all scurrying away, whimpering.

The small boat skimmed over the calm, still waves. Soon enough, these waves began to roll again, and the wind began to whistle and sing again.

Ace slowly lowered his hand, sitting down against the railing, his hands behind his head.

Everything was calm.

He smiled softly.

The ocean looked at peace in its jade-green gown, dancing gracefully under the sky.

The sky. A fearless, ever-changing blue. As the sun began to dip below the horizon, quivering shadows of tangerine and red were cast across the water.

_Red. Red blood. **Blood.**_

The sun. It was a fire in the bloody sky.

_Fire. Blood. **Fire and blood.**_

A shadow was cast over the crimson water.

_Dark. Everything's so **dark.**_

The last vestiges of light disappeared, leaving behind a world of black and red.

_Weak. I'm so **weak.**_

F _ire. Blood. Dark. Weak. Fire. Blood. Dark. Weak. Fire. Blood. Dark. Weak-_

The words kept repeating in his head.

"H-hey! Snap out of it!"

Ace blinked, realizing that he had been thinking out loud, and lifted his head.

"What's going on?"

"Don't just go 'What's going on?!" Buggy shrieked angrily, "You creeped me out!"

"Oh."

"Don't 'Oh' me!"

* * *

Ace stared up at the pine wood ceiling, his hands drifting to his chest which had only ever had 1 scar given to it.

He closed his eyes and began to sing a familiar tune under his breath.

_"Binkusu no sake wo, todoke ni yuku yo_

_Umikaze kimakase namimakase_

_Shio no mukou de, yuuhi mo sawagu_

_Sora nya wa wo kaku, tori no uta_

_Sayonara minato, Tsumugi no sato yo_

_DON to icchou utao, funade no uta_

_Kinpa-ginpa mo shibuki ni kaete_

_Oretachya yuku zo, umi no kagiri_

_Binkusu no sake wo, todoke ni yuku yo_

_Warera kaizoku, umi watteku_

_Nami wo makura ni, negura wa fune yo_

_H-ho ni hata ni ketateru wa dokuro-…"_

Ace's voice began to break.

_Luffy. Sabo. Oyaji. Marco. Thatch. Deuce. Everyone._

* * *

"Hey," Buggy asked worriedly, "Are you even sure we're still going in the right direction? Nobody was keeping a watch last night, so what if we're off track?"

"I don't know where we're going."

"EHH?!"

The clown groaned. His captain's son was weird. He didn't give a damn about the fact that they were _two Devil Fruit eaters alone_ on a boat - that looked like it would fall apart any second - drifting _in the middle of the Grand Line_ without any means of navigation.

Not only that, but Ace was creepy as hell during the night.

Last night, Buggy could've sworn he heard the boy humming the quiet tune of Bink's Sake, and then, just silent, barely audible sobbing.

The Roger Pirate had carefully sat up and looked at Ace's bed. Glazed eyes were wide open, staring blankly at a ceiling.

_"Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it..."_

The red-nosed clown hadn't known what to do, and he hadn't been brave enough to wake him up, so he simply drew his blankets over his ears and tried to sleep. Soon enough, everything was eerily quiet.

"Buggy," a voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Hm?"

"Island."

Buggy sighed in relief, as he detached his head to go take a closer look.

"It looks very... pink."

"Pink?"

* * *

As they docked, the two ex-Pirates could see that this island was indeed very pink.

Cherry blossom trees and petals decorated practically every inch of the streets.

Stalls and shops were made of Sakura wood, and people trudging through the streets were dressed from head to toe in pink, even their hair. Hell, even their eyebrows.

"Hey! You two!"

The source of the voice was a salesman, once again dressed entirely in pink.

"You guys new here?"

Ace nodded, looking sickened already from all the color.

"Heh. I'm quite sharp, so newcomers are easy to spot for me."

_Well, no shit, sir. Considering everybody else is just bathing in pink at this point._

"Anyways, I just wanted to tell you two that you should probably go get some pink clothes. And don't forget to dye your hair pink. Oh, and eyebrows too."

"EHHH?! WHY?!" Buggy yelled, looking horrified.

"Man, you sure are ignorant. This is the island of Pinkaika. Not wearing pink is such an outrageous crime that the punishment for not doing so is execution!"

_I feel like I've come here before. If I have, I'm glad I don't remember._

Ace sighed. "Let's go. No way I'm sticking around here any longer."

"For once you have common sense," the clown nodded enthusiastically.

Suddenly, the fire-user felt a presence he thought he had gotten away from. _Deuce._

Ace had been so distracted with all the pink, he hadn't sensed Deuce arrive at the same island.

Actually, now that he thought about it - how did the Mera Mera no mi get onto their boat?

He had been avoiding this question ever since it first happened, but the Devil Fruit should have been on Sixis and eaten by Deuce. His Haki didn't lie, and Deuce had to be here, so...

_What the hell happened on Sixis?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure where Sixis is, so let's pretend it's east of Loguetown and south-west of Dawn Island.
> 
> Pinkaika: Kaika in Japanese means blooming, flowering, or something like that. Pink + Kaika = Pinkaika. I know. I'm creative.


End file.
